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Ricky lost his job ten months ago. It was not a big issue initially as he expected to get another job within a few weeks – or so he thought. He and his wife had a fair amount of savings to tie them down in such a situation so it was not “life threatening.”But as the months rolled by and still no job offers came his way, cracks began to appear in his otherwise carefree relationship with his wife.

It was not that she was not supportive or encouraging, but a slew of sarcastic and nasty remarks would crop up in their daily conversations. “You are not doing enough. You should be out there walking the pavements instead of sitting at home” and so on. She also began to complain every time he purchased something. “You have no income but you can still buy that.”Ricky was at an all time low in his life. He used to bring in the big bucks but now had to rely on his wife. It made him feel that she was now wearing the “pants” in the family.

On the other hand, there is Jason who has not worked for eighteen months. But he tells me life is great and the crisis has actually brought his wife and family closer together.He revealed that he is now a house husband and spends his time cooking great dishes for the family, ferrying the kids to and fro school, and helping with house work i.e. DIY stuff, as they still maintain a domestic helper. His wife cherishes the thought of him spending more time with the kids. They have never been happier.

Hard times can either bond a family or break them. Families that enjoy good communication, trust and loving relationships with one another tend to draw on each other’s strengths and support one another in bad times. Situations like these call for us to make adjustments within our families and ourselves.

Firstly we should have a family talk, than search for ways to lower our costs of living either by eating out less or not at all. Next, we should source for jobs, never mind if you have to lower your expectations. Don’t blame yourself or each other. Husbands, share your feelings with your wife and family so they understand the emotional turmoil you are going through. Wives, do not add to the stress your husband is already feeling, instead support him. He would need your love now more than ever. For the family maintain a positive outlook and draw closer to each other. When your family is finally out of that slump, learn from the experience and plan for the future.

In hard time families with bad relationships fall apart while those with good relationships survive and become closer-knit.We must continually build our relationships with our families as an investment for the future.